Work Signs

 

· Sign over a gynaecologist's office:

"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."

 

· On a Plumbers truck:

"We repair what your husband fixed."

 

· On the trucks of a local plumbing company in Melbourne:

"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."

 

· Pizza shop slogan:

"7 days without pizza makes one weak."

 

· At a tyre shop in Wahroonga:

"Invite us to your next blowout."

 

· Door of a plastic surgeon's office:

"Hello. Can we pick your nose?"

 

· At a laundry shop:

"How about we refund your money, send you a new one

at no charge, close the store and have the manager shot.

Would that be satisfactory?"

 

· At a towing company:

"We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."

 

· On an electrician's truck:

"Let us remove your shorts."

 

· In a non-smoking area:

"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire

and take appropriate action."

 

· On a maternity room door:

"Push. Push. Push."

 

· At an optometrist's office:

"If you don't see what you're looking for,

you've come to the right place."

 

· On a taxidermist's window:

"We really know our stuff."

 

· In a podiatrist's office:

"Time wounds all heels."

 

· On a fence:

"Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive."

 

· At a car dealership:

"The quickest way to get back on your feet

- miss a car payment."

 

· Outside a muffler shop:

"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."

 

· In a veterinarian's waiting room:

"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"

 

· At the electric company:

"We would be de-lighted if you send in your bill.

However, if you don't, you will be."

 

· In a restaurant window:

"Don't stand there and be hungry.

Come on in and get fed up."

 

· In the front yard of a funeral home:

"Drive carefully. We'll wait."

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