- People Are Idiots

 

· Police in Wichita, Kansas, arrested a 22-year-old

man at an airport hotel after he tried to pass two

counterfeit $16 bills.

 

· A man in Johannesburg, South Africa, shot his

49-year-old friend in the face, seriously wounding

him, while the two practiced shooting beer cans off

each other's head.

 

· A Australian company trying to continue its

five-year perfect safety record showed its workers

a film aimed at encouraging the use of safety

goggles on the job. According to Industrial Machinery

News, the film's depiction of gory industrial

accidents was so graphic that twenty-five workers

suffered minor injuries in their rush to leave the

screening room. Thirteen others fainted, and one man

required seven stitches after he cut his head falling

off a chair while watching the film.

 

· The Chico, California, City Council enacted a ban

on nuclear weapons, setting a $500 fine for anyone

detonating one within city limits.

 

· A bus carrying five passengers was hit by a car in

Sydney, but by the time police arrived on the scene,

Fourteen pedestrians had boarded the bus and had begun

to complain of whiplash injuries and back pain.

 

· A convict broke out of jail in Washington DC, then

a few days later accompanied his girlfriend to her trial

for robbery. At lunch, he went out for a sandwich. She

needed to see him, and thus had him paged.

Police officers recognized his name and arrested him as

he returned to the courthouse in a car he had stolen

over the lunch hour.

 

· Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect

by placing a metal colander on his head and connecting it

with wires to a photocopy machine. The message "He's lying"

was placed in the copier, and police pressed the copy button

each time they thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth.

Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect

confessed.

 

· When a service station attendant in Bankstown, Sydney

refused to hand over the cash to an intoxicated robber, the

man threatened to call the police. The attendant still

refused, so the robber called the police and was arrested.

 

· A Los Angeles man who later said he was "tired of walking,"

stole a steamroller and lead police on a 5 mph chase until an

officer stepped aboard and brought the vehicle to a stop.

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